Day 75: Living within what it means

Thank you to Charlie for the encouraging comment on my day 72 comment – Maybe you come up as info – as google deems you to be just that – a bit like The Oracle in the Matrix 😉 You’re right – we’re struggling so much at the moment because I’m trying to pay as much as I can onto the overdraft. We’re also struggling so much because I’m … for the first time… actually AWARE when we’re running out of cash AND we’re not borrowing from every possible source to do all the things we expect to be able to do. It makes me realise just how much I had my head in the sand before I started this. If we ‘needed’ something we would get it – we’d go overdrawn and be charged up to £75 extra because of that, but we’d also have 3 credit cards and an overdraft to balance and borrow between. That’s why they’ve all grown out of control as its been a few years of spending way more than we make – I’m not only feeling the restriction of cutting back – I’m also feeling the restriction of NOT calling on those extra lenders to get us through a tight spot.
Tight as it is though… we SHOULD be able to manage – there are people who manage on less income – and yes – if we weren’t paying so much onto debt we’d manage a bit easier too. This month we’ve failed once – our Alliance and Leicester account has been overdrawn (as in OVER the overdraft) once for a day – it hasn’t happened in this shiny clean account and I was GUTTED – but when I got the notification through its only costing us £5. (Much better than HSBC may I say!) But 3 days to go to the end of the month and we might just manage. Yesterday we walked everywhere and ate weirdly as we were down to £17 and didn’t dare move from that… today we’ve got a child tax credit payment and expecting an expenses cheque to clear… giving us £80 to spend on petrol and food for Joel’s parents visiting – which strikes me as comfortably manageable – especially as I already spent money on cheesecake ingredients to try that feature piece again – that could keep us all going for a week on its own I should think!
Still … struggle as I may – its all fun and an exciting challenge – treating is as a game makes the whole thing more interesting! But today Joel is home, he’s teaching Holly to make a cup of coffee downstairs while I just opened the curtains to a happy light coming into my bedroom and I can sit in my cosy bed and write… the children have been gorgeously well behaved all week and make me laugh so much and today we’re making a family day out of visiting the garage, the supermarket and the recycling banks – the simple, free things can make a happy life. 🙂
Ooooh and tonight I’m driving down to Stoke to be on radio – Cross Rhythms radio are interviewing GoldDigger tonight at 7ish and playing some of our stuff so that should be fun… I’m slightly worried – not about the radio bit … but about driving there without getting lost… more money? I’d like a chauffeur please 🙂

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